Cold violence

Chapter 60

It stands to reason that a person's college entrance examination should be regarded as the first major event in this person's life, and it should be taken seriously.But Zhou Yu's college entrance examination was very dull, even a little deserted, no one sent the exam and no one took the exam, he completed everything by himself.

It starts with Chinese in the morning of the first day and ends with English in the afternoon of the last day.

The sound insulation of the hotel where he lived was not very good. When he was lying on the bed alone at night, he could hear the girls in the next room playing.

He remembered thinking at that time, if he and He Chu hadn't broken up, would they do the same?

But there are many "ifs" in this world.

It's a pity that these "ifs" all appear in a situation that clearly knows that it is impossible to realize.

So when he thought about it later, he just thought it was funny, he was no longer from the same world, did he still think that so many people are making people laugh?

It turned out that I was still thinking about He Chu at that time, how humble I must have been...

But even though he thinks a lot at night, he will never bring these emotions into the examination room. He has always been clear and purposeful.

He was very good in himself, and he had no distractions during the exam. Coupled with the pressure of the college entrance examination itself, he knew that he should be able to perform supernormally this time.

Finally freed.

Freed from the state of being looked down upon, from the self-torture day and night.

The moment he came out of the examination room, for the first time, he felt that even his breathing was so smooth, and he even looked at everything in the world with color.

This was his final period of high school, and the only time he had been happy in a long time.

It's a pity that his happiness didn't last long, because he saw the woman waiting at his door.

When he went upstairs, his steps were still brisk, and there should be a little relieved smile on his face.

So the woman's face appeared in front of him.

The woman still has exquisite makeup and elegant clothes, which set her off with a noble temperament. Her eyes are calm, but she is still serious.

Seeing Zhou Yu's arrival, her gaze deepened a bit.

Years of hard work in the mall has given her a sharp temperament. When she looks at Zhou Yu, she always seems to be looking at a large number of items.

That's right, she said many years ago that Zhou Yu was just an investment.

Zhou Yu's expression also gradually faded, he stood still in the corridor, and called out respectfully: "Mother."

The woman stood at the door, not saying much, not even a word of care for her son who just finished the college entrance examination.

There was a man standing quietly behind her with a stack of paper bags in his arms. Zhou Yu recognized this man as his mother's lawyer.

He didn't pay attention to what happened to the woman bringing the lawyer, he just thought of a question suddenly.

When was the last time you saw a woman?

Standing at the corner of the stairs, Zhou Yu thought quietly, maybe it was the first time in high school when she met him from a distance in Happy Valley...

At that time, she had a really pretty smile, but Zhou Yu recorded it in her heart just by looking at it from a distance.

Because that was the only time Zhou Yu saw her smile in all these years.

It's just a little fortunate that the woman didn't see him, otherwise... she would probably have quickly restrained her smile... Even if they meet face to face, it might be embarrassing.

And the last time they spoke face to face...it seemed like many years ago.

It's hard, she still recognizes herself.

He collected his thoughts, walked upstairs slowly, and opened the door for the woman and the lawyer.

Zhou Yu's home was very simple, the woman didn't comment much on the furnishings of the home, she just went straight to the sofa and sat down, looking coldly at her son who was about to grow up soon.

Yes, Zhou Yu is almost an adult.

It has been 18 years since she met that man...

Thinking of this, she suddenly felt a little melancholy.

Maybe starting today, the last link between me and that man will also disappear.

Zhou Yu was right in front of her, completely separated from her.

His face is very similar to hers, it is the kind of likeness that as long as two people meet, people around can know the relationship between them.

But Zhou Yu didn't have the fierce aura of a woman. When he was expressionless, others would only think he was cold and not sharp.

His eyes were exactly the same as those of a woman's, but he also had a pair of slightly gentle eyebrows. When he lowered his head, the ends of his eyebrows seemed to extend into his temples, making his eyebrows and eyes slender.

He lowered his head and cleaned the coffee table, then stood quietly waiting for the woman to speak.

The woman stared at Zhou Yu with complicated eyes.

This boy has exactly the same face as himself, and his temperament is exactly the same as his back then.

Then she thought of Zhou Yu's father, who was obviously such a strong person, who was always silent in front of her, wouldn't say a word, and even seemed a little timid.

When she was young, she also thought about what she would be like if she had a son in the future, and what she would do to him, but when she really had a son, it seemed that she had done nothing for him, instead she was doing her best. Most of them are cold-eyed.

It turned out that Zhou Yu had grown so tall before he knew it...

Suddenly there was "warmth" in her heart, but she thought of Zhou Yu's father again, and the look in her eyes turned cold again.

"You've also finished the college entrance examination. I'm here to explain to you about your father's will."

The woman looked at him for a long time before she withdrew her gaze.

Zhou Yu hasn't said a word since seeing her until now, just doing his own thing silently, and when he's done, he stands aside, as if waiting for her to speak.

She was also somewhat lofty back then, but that year she was a little princess who was raised by her parents, and no one would prejudice her because of her arrogance, but Zhou Yu was different. Without doing anything for him, his life must have been much harder than hers back then.

Seeing Zhou Yu's current appearance, she couldn't help but sigh that Zhou Yu was a much stronger child than she was back then.

"You sit."

This was a rule they had when they were still living together, and Zhou Yu only sat down after getting her permission.

Before that, his eyes had nowhere to rest, and he was always on the door of He Chu's room.

It was as if through that door, one could see the boy who had given him a sense of security.

She pointed to the sofa next to her, meaning to let Zhou Yu sit there, and then motioned for the lawyer to put the documents on the table.

"Your father passed away suddenly that year, but his will was made early in the morning."

The woman put the top document in front of Zhou Yu, and continued: "We are a commercial marriage, and you know that, so I can't just give you to others for my own selfish desire."

Zhou Yuxin said yes, that's why you put up with your distaste for our family and brought me to today.

"So your father said in his will that he needs me to take you to the college entrance examination, and then hand over his company to you. Although I know that I have not fully fulfilled the obligations and responsibilities of a mother in these years, I also hope that you can understand me."

Zhou Yu raised his eyes and looked at his mother.

Her tone was as if she was here to discuss a business contract, every word was orderly, even she had already set the price, there was no need to discuss it, just nod her head.

This is his mother, but she said such heart-wrenching words to herself.

It turns out that you also know that you have not fulfilled your duties and responsibilities as a mother.

But now you ask me to...understand you?

What should I understand about you?

Understand that you abandoned us back then, understand those hurtful things you said to me, or understand that we are both children, but you don't care about me alone, and you care about another girl, just because I am my father's son ?

How do you make me understand?

For so many years, he has always remembered his mother in his heart. He has love in his heart, but it is not without hatred.

When I was a child, I was alone in every storm, and when I grew up, I was still alone among countless gossips and contempt.

For so many years, I have been alone for so many years, if you could be by my side, would I still be like this today?

Resentment is not without it.

But in the end, he didn't say anything.

Because he knew early on that she wouldn't listen.

He lowered his head and flipped through the thin paper.

It was written in black and white that his father would hand over the company to him when he was an adult. Before that, all the affairs of his company were taken care of by women, and the profits were distributed by women themselves.

It's no wonder that women haven't shown their faces for so many years, but they have never treated themselves badly in terms of money. In his opinion, the monthly living expenses are considered a sky-high price, but in fact, this is not considered to be a woman at all. on what.

The woman seemed to know what Zhou Yu was thinking, and suddenly said:

"Of course, I didn't hold your father's money in my hands, except for the money I sent you every month. You know, I don't lack these." She said with a bank card Pushed it to Zhou Yu's hand.

Yes, she has never been short of these things.

He can also help his father manage the company and raise himself, which can be regarded as the utmost benevolence.

Yes, benevolent and righteous.

So there is nothing to complain about, Zhou Yu.

"I don't have much to say about the rest. Your father and I don't love each other. I have helped him manage the company in the name of my wife for so many years. No shame."

The woman's cold voice rang in his ears, Zhou Yu just stared at the signature on his father's will in a daze, until the woman finished saying this, he said coldly: "So..."

"No reason. Zhou Yu, I have delayed myself for many years because of your father. Without you, I have no obligation to help you take care of the company that will soon belong to you. The older relatives in your father's family are gone. This company is fully managed by you and your uncle, and there are so many years of hard work in it, I hope you don't ruin it."

Zhou Yu was speechless.

It's this sentence again, "Don't spoil it".

From childhood to adulthood, all the favors I have received seem to be followed by the sentence "don't ruin it".

So in his opinion, all those alms were linked to "benefits", and they all appeared to be such material things.

Overnight, he seemed to be burdened with a huge burden. The company of his father, who had passed away for many years, was on his head. The shadow enveloped his whole body, making him unable to breathe.

He felt that his sense of "family affection" was already very weak, but now there was a will that was made many years ago, linking them together again.

He was too young when his father left, and to this day he can no longer remember his father's face, and even because his tomb is abroad, he has no chance to visit it once...

"Oh, I see."

His heart was agitated, but he could only say these few words.

"I've helped you buy a plane ticket back to your home, so you just treat it as... This is the last thing I will do for you. My obligation has been fulfilled, so please don't bother anyone in the future."

After the woman finished speaking, she put the documents in the lawyer's hand on the table, and stood up: "I will hand over the same things that he gave me to you today, so keep them well."

"Do you really think we have delayed you all these years?"

Zhou Yu suddenly made a sound, looking directly into the woman's eyes for the first time, facing the sharp blades in her eyes.

"What do you want to say, Zhou Yu?"

When the woman mentioned this question, she suddenly became sharp, and her tone was no longer calm but with a hint of coldness. This is the way she speaks after so many years in the mall. Just one sentence can drive a strong aura, making the People dare not underestimate the woman in front of them.

She was covered in armor from top to bottom, and she didn't relax in the slightest when facing his only son.

"If it wasn't for your father, I wouldn't have gotten married so early back then. If it wasn't for you... I could live a better life without you. I've taken care of you for so many years, and I've cared enough for you. If it wasn't for you, I am also a person who can pursue my own happiness well. Now you come to question me, from what angle did you stand to make you say this?"

Zhou Yu just felt like laughing a little.

Why should I question her...

He thought again after so many years, women really don't lack anything from him, and she herself has the right to reject his existence...

This woman has hated his father for so many years, and she has hated herself for so many years, but she has grown up after all.

Sneering words... what else is it?

There is still a humble life, what could be a greater favor than this?

"You fulfilled my father's last wish, and I fulfilled your private wish. Then from now on, we will have nothing to do with each other. You can rest assured."

As he spoke, he bowed to the woman and the lawyer.

The woman didn't seem to want to stay in this room for another second, even Zhou Yu didn't take a second look, and left with the lawyer.

Zhou Yu heard the sound of her pointed shoes stepping on the ground echoing in the corridor.

Her footsteps were so hasty, as if staying here for a moment longer would be an insult to her.

"But be happy, mother."

He has been calling "mother" in a polite manner for so many years, just because the title "mother" sounds too intimate, like a child, but no one regards him as a "child".

Only when the women were gone, did he dare to talk to himself to satisfy his little extravagant desire.

Say "Mom," whether she can hear you or not.

Zhou Yu listened to the sound of her hurriedly leaving footsteps, from the rush at the beginning, to calmness in the end, he sat back on the sofa and stared at the few document bags in front of him, the top one was the plane ticket to go abroad that the woman had booked for him .

She still hates herself, she is willing to condescend to sit down and talk to him so much, probably because she is about to leave her to make her happy...

The last thing she did for him was to carry out his father's will. It's ridiculous that she didn't even call his father's name from the beginning to the end.

She separated herself from them early on, and after fulfilling those obligations, she no longer had anything to do with them, the father and son who had delayed her.

Even the relationship he should have with her on the surface is only because of his father's will.

Zhou Yu thought of the woman and her current husband's daughter for no reason.

That petite and lovely little girl, that little guy with so many things he couldn't ask for, what a happy child she must be?

Zhou Yu has been envious of her since she was born, and has been envious of her for so many years.

It's just the part of warmth she has, which is all that I have been thinking about for so many years.

The woman said that she had done her duty... But, wasn't Zhou Yu always fulfilling the woman's wish?

If Zhou Yu hadn't lived in school since elementary school, if Zhou Yu hadn't moved out early when she knew she was going to get married in junior high school, if Zhou Yu hadn't avoided women's life far away...

If he can act like a girl with his mother when he doesn't know the world, if he can lose his temper and occasionally be self-willed to his mother like a real son, if he can also get That woman's staring at each other...

He has really imagined too many "ifs" in his life, because there are always many regrets.

But if there is no regret, this life may not be complete.

He was born to be the stain in that woman's life, the bomb she avoided, the proof of the commercial marriage she hated the most, and even the homosexuality she found disgusting... all of them could make him a reason to be discarded by women at will. .

Learn to be content.

He said to himself, at least she still has your life.

He put away the thin ticket and started packing his things.

He has to leave the place where he stayed for three years.

He has lived here for so long, and finally he doesn't have to go back to this place that was once called "home".

It's ridiculous that he has lived for so long, and he has only had a home for half a year, and now the last person who should have a home with him is gone.

Life is alive, and what supports people to live is one small obsession after another. If these things are gone, it seems to be meaningless to him.

The college entrance examination is over, and he said goodbye to those people in the past. His mother has no contact with him, and now he has to leave.

He put away the documents that belonged to him one by one. He knew the value of these thin sheets of paper, so he carefully gathered them in the corner of the coffee table and started to pack his things.

But in fact, he didn't have many things, except for clothes and books. At that time, He Chu brought the things brought to him by He Chu. new.

He looked at the locked door again...

Zhou Yu walked to the door and slowly pushed it open.

The afternoon sun was lazily shining on the floor, and he sat on the head of that bed as he had done countless times before, sniffing the smell in the air carefully.

That kind of faint, with a feeling of afternoon sunshine, mixed with the smell of grass and trees, as if He Chu was still there.

After He Chu moved out, Zhou Yu bought the aroma diffuser that He Chu had used before, and lit one regularly to maintain the smell in the house.

In this way, every time he comes back, the smell can travel in his nasal cavity between his breaths, and when he closes his eyes, he can even think about the place where that person is leaning a little bit inside, Reading the novel boredly, raising his head and smiling at him from time to time, or directly dragging him to the bed to make a fuss...

In his own way, he kept that person by his side.

After so long, he has changed, and He Chu has also changed, only the boy in his heart is as beautiful as before.

He couldn't tell whether he couldn't let go of He Chu, or the person who once liked him.

These two people are the same person, but they feel completely different to themselves.

What he likes is the person from before, and the current He Chu can only embarrass him.

He knew that, in fact, there was a big reason for the two to separate, but he was too willful in the past and didn't want to tell himself.

Now that I am about to leave and start a new life, let's keep those thoughts in this room.

When he wants to let go of something, he will always think about many things in his mind again. Only then will he face his mistakes and feelings, and only then can he be truly relieved.

I used to hold on to it, just because I didn't want to let it go.

He Chu...maybe not such an important person, but He Chu is absolutely important to him.

At least at that time, Zhou Yu felt that he couldn't give up.

That's why they indulged like crazy at the beginning of their breakup.

Is it really just trapped by love?

——Actually not.

He Chu treats him with tolerance and indulgence. He enjoys the joy and warmth that this person gives him.

What he plays in this relationship is more of the identity of the recipient. He Chu treats him well, he accepts it, and accepts everything according to the order. He Chu loses his temper. In his opinion, it is He Chu's own problem. , he wanted to ask, but never took action.

No matter how much tenderness, in fact, it will be exhausted in such "cold reception".

It's not that he doesn't like it, it's just that he hasn't learned how to like it yet.

He doesn't know how to be nice to a person, because few people are nice to him.

So he relied on He Chu, like a dying fish, desperately drinking the rain from the sky.

It would be even better if the rain only belonged to him.

Insufficient greed, in fact, probably talking about himself.

Thinking about it later, in fact, the two broke up... It should be an inevitable thing.

Before the breakup, he always felt that He Chu was the one who would never leave no matter what, and he would never let He Chu leave, but when He Chu really proposed to break up, he didn't seem as groggy as he thought. As plain as it is, facing the facts in front of you.

Only after breaking up did he feel the piercing pain.

Later, he was a little more panicked, afraid that such a good person as He Chu would be gentle to others.

Sometimes just thinking about it makes him feel extremely angry.

But what reason do you have to be angry?He Chu was no longer the person by his side, and it was his freedom to be nice to others.

But fortunately, that person never appeared beside He Chu.

Zhou Yu was almost fortunate.

In his short life, he has not received much tenderness, and there are very few people who gave him tenderness. No one has been by his side long enough to teach him how to discover the beauty of life. He knows what true love is.

At his most innocent age, he was locked at home. When he should feel what a friend is, he confuses "friendship" with "love". When he should cherish someone the most, but because of Don't know how to like and miss that person in the end.

So, it shouldn't be too late to love someone again when...you really learn how to be nice to someone, or when you really learn to love someone.

It's just that the possibility of them meeting in the future is very small, and He Chu... probably has to become the regret in his heart.